Episode #76: Jacob Fishbein Author of, The Men’s Group: A Novel of Messy Friendships
In Episode 76 of the Miles Ahead Podcast, host Dr. Miles Salisbury sits down with coach, facilitator, and author Jake Fishbine to explore the deep terrain of men’s work, personal mythology, and the transformative power of brotherhood.
Jake is the co-author of The Men's Group: A Novel of Messy Friendships (co-written with Nicholas Papadopoulos) and co-leader of The Arena Men’s Group. In this engaging conversation, Jake shares his decade-long journey of writing a novel about men's transformation, how Greek mythology, specifically the myth of Theseus and the Minotaur, helps us understand our shame and disempowering narratives, and why ongoing communal support is critical for modern men.
Whether you're curious about joining a men's group, navigating your own "Minotaur," or interested in the power of storytelling to heal, this episode offers practical wisdom and deep reflection on what it means to be human.
In This Episode, We Cover:
The 10-Year Journey of Writing The Men's Group – How an 11-year mentorship evolved into co-authoring a novel that captures the raw, messy, and honest process of men’s transformational work.
The Minotaur & The Labyrinth – Using Greek mythology to understand our disempowering shame narratives and why "killing the Minotaur" isn't the goal—learning to integrate and make peace with it is.
"Raising the White Sail" – The trap of self-sabotage after major life triumphs and how men can cultivate self-awareness to stay grounded.
The Power of Co-Facilitation – Why structure, accountability, and multiple perspectives create a safer, richer container for men's groups.
Beyond the Weekly Session – Why the real value of men's work happens between sessions through action, reflection, and peer connections.
Overcoming the "Nice Guy" Archetype – Practical homework exercises (Maximum Value Practices) that help men claim what they want and advocate for their own needs.
Making Friends as Adult Men – How to move past surface-level sports talk and ask "beautiful questions" that build genuine connection.
Key Timestamps:
[00:00:57] – The origin story of co-writing The Men's Group over a 10-year period
[00:03:53] – Why co-facilitation and container boundaries matter in men's groups
[00:15:21] – Deep dive into the Minotaur myth: Shame, disempowering stories, and integration vs. destruction
[00:21:42] – The story of Theseus, forgetting to raise the white sail, and ego-driven self-sabotage
[00:28:20] – The Action-Reflection cycle and using Maximum Value Practices (MVPs) for real-world growth
[00:33:11] – An MVP exercise: Asking the women in your life three courageous questions
[00:48:50] – How to ask "beautiful questions" to build deeper adult male friendships
Connect with Jake Fishbine:
Website/Join a Group: Arena Mens Group
Substack: The Hungry Reader
Book: The Men's Group: A Novel of Messy Friendships (Available at major booksellers)
Work With Me
If this episode resonated with you—whether you're working through shame, learning to integrate your own "Minotaur," breaking out of "Nice Guy" patterns, or seeking deeper, genuine connections with other men; my practice is structured to support you through these exact themes.
I work with clients on:
Navigating Men's Group Work & Mentorship: Moving past surface-level dynamics to build real accountability, structure, and depth in your life.
Overcoming the "Nice Guy" Archetype: Reclaiming your needs, setting healthy boundaries, and stepping into clear self-advocacy through practical daily tools.
Integrating Shame & Shadow: Using archetypal and narrative frameworks to make peace with disempowering self-talk rather than constantly fighting it.
Post-Triumph Grounding & Transition: Spotting self-sabotage patterns after major wins ("raising the white sail") and sustaining meaningful personal momentum.
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